I have a new page, its name is Goals. It was born on June 20th, three days after my mother’s birthday that I forgot about, and one day after Father’s Day which I also forgot about. Who wants to adopt this wonderful, caring son?
– Happy Summer, everybody. It’s a long time coming. Boston was really rough this Winter/Spring, with non-stop rain and snow and cold and generally poor anything conditions. The Dominican Republic has seen heat spells of 91 degrees and cold spells with highs in the mid-80s. I’m hoping the Summer will see a more consistent trend, I just don’t know how to dress day to day any more. By the way, in Spanish (or their version of) they don’t capitalize months or seasons, odd.
– Miley Cyrus, move over. Rebecca Black, you’re done. Jennifer Lopez has exceeded your stupidity in lyrical desecration through her new single. I’m generally known for my sense of wide musical tolerance, especially with current pop culture artists, whom I have the utmost respect for. However, JLo has gone Black Eyed Peas with her song here, and I can’t let it slide. Also, her album is called Love?; she must think she’s Ron Burgundy. I refuse to link to a Youtube of this song because it violates my personal belief of “don’t spread crap”, but without further ado, the first verse:
If you go hard you gotta get on the floor
If you’re a party freak then step on the floor < How else would you get on the floor?
If your an animal then tear up the floor < U can c dat thuh transcriber is a moron
Break a sweat on the floor < They must be thinking really hard
Yeah we work on the floor < Where?
Don’t stop keep it moving < That doesn’t
end rhyme with floor!
Put your drinks up < I need another
Pick your body up and drop it on the floor < ?
Let the rhythm change your world on the floor < Peace on Earth
You know we’re running s*** tonight on the floor < Yes, I believe you made that clear
London to Ibiza,
Straight to LA, New York, < Apparently Asia doesn’t listen to music
Vegas to Africa < Right, plenty of discotheques in Africa
The next verse is much worse, so adverse for your health that it would put you in a hearse. In that one sentence I rhymed two more words than she did with ‘floor’ in the entire song. Jenny from the Block, you’ve come
a long way nowhere since your glory days.
– As you must know by now (it made the front page of DrudgeReport), I went to Cabarete this weekend to surf. The 4 hour bus ride costs 330 pesos (~$8) and had the most comfortable seats I’ve ever been in. Also, it was freezing cold in it, the first time I’ve seen condensation on the outside of a vehicle. For the surf, it was 8:30-11ish every day and nothing too crazy, maybe 5-6 foot waves. I had a pretty good weekend, as evidenced by these numbers:
- Caught 4 waves, 2 hang-tens, and almost killed an Australian lady my first time up.
- Better conditions, caught a few more, but started to get pummeled towards the end. Cut up my fingers on my right hand a bit, too.
- Same conditions as the first day, but definitely took better advantage of them. Kind of learned how to turn, and definitely learned to not try to backflip off the board near the shore. Cut my left hand on the rocks this time.
– I discovered something new about the office today. So you know how we order from this guy who makes full meals for about $4 every day., but I bet you didn’t know that there is also a frutero that chops up a fresh fruit salad full of banana, papaya, mango, and pineapple for under $2. Dom Franklin, meet your competition. This week I start my project, so let’s rock and roll. We’re going to Punta Cana Thursday-Saturday and I’m going to try to go to the Northwest part of the country next week, – San Fernando de Montecristi. Travel travel travel travel travel.
– More food: I just had homemade Mofongo, not a poser restaurant version. The couple I live with owns a full-fledged farm, and used their farm’s pig (chicharon de puerco is the crispy pig’s skin ingredient), home-grown plaintains, cilantro, garlic, and organic rock salt*. This stuff was so bomb I almost cried. The skin of the pig was as crackly as the Memorial Day weekend’s, and the plaintains were as soft as Pupu’s hair. I’m sad it would be useless for me to learn this dish, for the ingredients are purely Dominican and I don’t want to raise a pig. Also, they made some dessert. This was boiled cashew fruit with cinnamon, and tasted like dulce de leche on steroids. So hungry, yet so full.
*I actually typed that as a joke, then looked it up to make fun of you for believing that you could actually have organic salt. It exists, and is supposedly good for you. Joke’s on me.